It’s obvious, isn’t it!?  I am a girl.

So why do I get called a guy over and over and over again throughout my day?  From coworkers, friends, family, men, and even other women?  Why, at the gym, does my female trainer shout, “You got this guys!!” When it’s only myself and my other female friend there?  What guys? Where.. where are the guys?  There are none.  Call us what we are, empower what we ARE.

So today at the gym, after my male trainer said “good job today guys” to my female friend and I… I started to walk away, then turned back towards him and another male, and yelled, “bye girls! Good job” HA.  Their eyes widened, they were shocked!

E X A C T L Y

Yet, over and over and over again, being called a guy throughout my entire life has somehow been deemed okay, a social norm, conditioning of some sort.  In the past, I probably liked it secretly… I used to feel I was more on the masculine side of the female spectrum, I used to envy men.  They always seemed stronger and faster during recess and competitive games and they had more privileges that I wanted, aka: got to watch the game on TV while my mom made me clean the table and do the dishes (haha).  So I probably didn’t mind being called a guy, I wanted “to be one of the guys”.  Men didn’t have to worry about their hair and makeup, how attractive they were, how quiet they should be, how small and petit they need appear, how short their skirt was because some woman might get turned on and try to hurt them… no men didn’t have to worry about any of that, seemingly…

But lately, becoming more sensitive and aware of the words and energies used to describe me and my femaleness – hearing my beautiful female body and essence being called a GUY?? Yuck! It’s extremely irritating, like nails to a chalkboard.  I wonder, when did that become okay?  What message has that sent to women as a whole and to young girls who are told they are a girl but repeatedly get called a guy?  What about the fact that it does not go the other way… what message does that send?

It’s obvious, isn’t it.

A message that asserts males are the dominant gender.  A message that says cover up your femaleness.  A message that says be okay with being called what you are not.  A message that says be okay with being called what is better than you and do not expect men to be okay with being called ‘girls’… still the 1st graders inside those grown men reaction”ew girls…..I’m not a giiiiiiiirl”.

I’m not a guy, don’t call me one.  Even if I exhibit ‘masculine traits’, even if I lift more weight than other men, even if I am a beast on the soccer field, that is all woman, that is girl.

Whenever possible.  Speak to what and who the person is (and the broader perspective of them as well, the being beyond gender.. but in this earthly life experience, speaking to that persons gender is important TOO).

I am extremely conscious as I coach little kids soccer to always included girls and boys whenever I am using words to encourage, “good job boys and girls”  “good job Mr. and Mrs.Shark”… to embody the message: whichever gender you are is recognized, is okay, is perfect, is capable, is allowed to be its own expression ❤